Ralph

[Adatise]

Ralph came home drunk one night, slid into bed beside his

sleeping wife, and fell into a deep slumber.



He awoke before the Pearly Gates, where St. Peter said,

'You died in your sleep, Ralph..'



Ralph was stunned. 'I'm dead? No, I can't be!

I've got too much to live for. Send me back!'



St. Peter said, 'I'm sorry, but there's only

one way you can go back, and that is as a chicken.'



Ralph was devastated, but begged St. Peter to send him to a

farm near his home.. The next thing he knew, he was covered

with feathers, clucking, and pecking the ground.

A rooster strolled past. 'So, you're the new hen,

huh? How's your first day here?'



'Not bad,' replied Ralph the hen, 'but I have

this strange feeling



inside. Like I'm gonna

explode!'



'You're ovulating,' explained the rooster.

'Don 't tell me you've never laid an egg

before? '



'Never,' said Ralph.



'Well, just relax and let it happen,' says the

rooster. 'It's no big deal.'



Ralph did, and a few uncomfortable seconds later, out

popped an egg!



Ralph was overcome with emotion as he experienced

motherhood. He soon laid another egg -- his joy was

overwhelming.



As he was about to lay his third egg, he felt a smack on

the back of his head, and heard his wife yell.....



Ralph! Wake up. You shit the bed!'